Earlier today I went to a DHL office here in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, to pick up my new, ten-year U.S. passport, which I’ve waited many weeks to receive:
My previous passport, issued in 2014, when my plans to retire to Mexico were just beginning to germinate, expired in September, so I applied for a new one. Frankly, I doubt I’ll be needing this new passport. I have no plans to do any international travel in my 80’s, especially not to Donald Trump’s U.S.A.
For those of us U.S. citizens here in San Miguel who voted from afar for Kamala Harris and felt sure she would win to become the first woman U.S. president – following Mexico’s impressive lead in electing a woman president this year – the results of the U.S. election this week were devastating. The cold numbness I felt at first, due to too many thoughts and emotions ricocheting wildly in my mind and heart, is beginning to thaw now, so I’m striving to make some sense of it all.
Oddly, one of my first reactions to the news that Trump won was relief: Oh, thank God, I thought, there won’t be an imminent civil war! I’d read a chilling article in the new New Yorker the previous day about the millions of Americans who were seriously prepping — including arming themselves with combat rifles — for a civil war, in case things didn’t go their way. Well, WHEW, those types got their way. Civil war postponed.
Similarly, I was relieved that there wouldn’t be violence, bloodshed, or torch-bearers marching threateningly in the streets. Those types won. They’re celebrating now and not, for the moment anyway, aiming their rifles at anyone, including, for example, Liz Cheney or Kamala Harris.
I also felt relief that the decision was mercifully quick: Like a freshly sharpened guillotine blade. It would not drag on agonizingly for weeks and weeks, as it did with Bush and Gore in 2000 when I was living in Ségou, Mali, West Africa. There in Mali, where everyone was closely following that election on their shortwave radios tuned to Radio France, the Africans I interacted with commiserated with me daily. They were all rooting for Gore, as was I, and expressed their sincere sorrow to me when he ultimately lost.
Also, oddly, some of my initial reactions included thankfulness. I was deeply thankful to Kamala for the hope that she gave us, albeit short-lived, that the U.S. could and would be wise enough to elect a supremely qualified woman over a proven unqualified man. I was thankful for all her hard work, her stamina, her smarts, her unwavering dignity and grace. I was particularly thankful for her gracious concession speech, which underscored the country’s proud tradition of peaceful transfers of power — something Trump proved incapable of doing four years ago when he lost and certainly would not have done this time around had he lost again. I felt thankful that she has shown herself to be a shining role model for countless women and girls, not only in the U.S. but around the world.
And she’s not finished. In her concession speech, she said, “While I concede this election, I do not concede the fight that fueled this campaign. Hear me when I say, the light of America’s promise will always burn bright — as long as we never give up. And as long as we keep fighting.”
Unlike many of my good friends who, fortunately for them, never had the great misfortune of crossing paths in their long lives with a man such as Trump, I was not shocked by the outcome of this election. No, shock was not one of my reactions; rather, what I felt was more like déjà vu. I know from experience how charming such con men can be and how easily their unsuspecting prey can be bamboozled by their promises and lies. Yes, Virginia, the “bad guys” do win sometimes. Sorry to say. C’est la vie.
But my over-arching feelings about all this, I think, are sadness and dread. Trump’s clear win this week is a setback for all who, still, despite all, attempt to cling to the priceless American ideals we were all taught in school – equality, liberty, and justice for all. Meaning ALL.
As I see it from this distance, Trump’s U.S.A. in this, his second opportunity to run the country, will reflect his character more than ever: White supremacy will reign supreme. The patriarchy will rule. Xeno-, homo-, trans- and other such phobias will be unbound. Respect for elders will be a foreign concept. Dinero will be dios. Cruelty toward the downtrodden — in direct contradiction to Christ’s clear teachings — will be celebrated in this supposedly “Christian” nation. The young white men with their newly deepened voices who gather to chant, “U.S.A.!…U.S.A.!…U.S.A.!” might well add to their chant, “über alles.”
Despair is a tempting emotion, but it gets us nowhere. As Kamala reminded us all in her concession speech, “You have the capacity to do extraordinary good in the world. And so to everyone who is watching, do not despair. This is not a time to throw up our hands. This is a time to roll up our sleeves.”
Roll up sleeves, yes, and I would add: take stock. If you are young and strong and have the wherewithal and the stomach for it, by all means, stay with the struggle and continue to fight – peaceably and intelligently – against great odds, for decency and equality in the U.S. If you no longer have the youth and strength for this, I would suggest you investigate the possibility of emigrating. The world is big – close to 200 countries in all – and some of them, like the country I now gratefully call home, Mexico, are warm, welcoming, and affordable.
Human beings have been migrating in search of better places to live ever since mankind began walking on two legs. All of our forebears – if we’re not Native Americans – came to the U.S. as immigrants or slaves. We are free to leave now. We have options. It’s not jumping ship. It’s pulling up your own anchor and sailing on. It’s worth looking into. And I’ve found it’s possible to do good, too, from a distance.
First step: make sure your passport is not expired; it may be a long wait for a new one.
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Here’s a worthwhile article on countries worth considering: https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/story/6-countries-with-temporary-residency-visas-for-us-citizens-034836250.html
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Thank you for your wisdom, Bonnie. I have been, for quite some time, encouraging my granddaughters to seek their higher education abroad, in a place they may like to live, a place that does not see a woman as as less than. Start to earn the language now and make a serious life plan. Their will be no place for Korean women in this new America. My son left over a decade ago and immigrated to Japan trading this place for one that cares about its people ,their welfare. and the environment in which they inhabit. My heart is breaking.
Thank you, dear Barbara, for sharing this. Yes, it’s a big world, and we owe it to ourselves to explore it. My mom, daughter of German immigrants, used to think that the U.S. was the whole world, and our hometown, Hillsdale, NJ, was the center of it. She and I disagreed on this! I think that the American Empire is falling.
How beautifully you express my own feelings. Thank you, Bonnie. Your paragraphs are a balm on tightly held fears, a calm that’s much much appreciated.
Thank you, Marie. I believe that’s what a writer’s job is — to be a voice for others.
Thank you for expressing my own thoughts. Your paragraphs are a balm on tightly held fears and much much appreciated.
Dear Bonnie, Let me assure you that we living in the US share your pain! We are shocked, horrified, and in despair that Trump won. At my age, I am grieving that the generous, kind, and welcoming country I knew will not return in my lifetime. Back in 2016, when Trump first started speaking, his message and style had “Hitler” written all over it. Now he has returned, and I am terrified. Who are his followers coming for after they come for the good people you identified in your message? Crimes against Jews and Asians and anyone who is “different” are rising. Xenophobia is rearing its very ugly head in unheard of ways. We will abandon our European allies…but why go on…you all know – this is disaster.
Pamela
Yes, it’s horrifying, Pamela. Have you considered returning to SMA?
Oh, Bonnie, as ever, your words of wisdom bring some sense to a senseless situation. Fear is not something I usually gravitate to, but I am afraid. It’s too early for me to see the light, for darkness seems imminant. I hope it will come, but I am feeling too numb to find it, too dead inside to care and too angry to put it into words. I honestly don’t know which way to turn. The sky will remain blue, the waves will continue to roll in, the moon will rise, the stars will shine.These no one can take away from us. And yet everything else seems at stake. Thank you for your advice, definitely worth heeding. Sending hugs and love.
Thank you, dearest MM, for sharing your thoughts and feelings. Yes, it’s too early to see the path ahead, but it’s not too early to investigate options. Have you and Tony considered a villa in Italy? 🙂
BonnieDear, that is the clearest-eyed writing I’ve read since the election. No Pollyanna cheerleading but also no despair.
I woke up this morning thinking that we need to let our ideas of America go. Our slogan is now “We were the Americans.”
But there’s still a landmass filled with loving, kind, and generous people. Yesterday, I hugged Michael and said, “Thank you for being a white man with enough confidence that he can willingly share the opportunities of our nation without feeling threatened.”
Maybe someday, if they ever turn off Fox News, these entitled bullies will learn that it truly is more blessed to give than to take.
Thanks for organizing your thoughts and taking the time to share them with us.
Love,
Be xoxo
Thank you so much, dearest Be, for your generous thoughts. Yes, your Michael is a rare gem! We are certainly living in “interesting” [my least favorite word in the English language] times. Vamos a ver, querida!
Hi Bonnie its been a long time since we communicated. Like you and many others I am very saddened and shocked by the US election results. For the moment I have lost all energy to react. I feel numb. When you have a moment could you send me the PDF summary about your life. I can’t find your weekly letter where you said that if we were interested you would forward it. Many thanks Ann Nichols
So good to hear from you, Ann. I hope you’re doing well. Yes, I’m happy to send you my new book, THE OTHER SIDE. I’ve also made it available (as a free gift) on my website. Best wishes, Bonnie
Thank you Bonnie. In Heartfelt solidarity.
Thank YOU, Rae. Yes, solidarity.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I will try to not despair. This election did indeed break my heart, I need a break and time to rethink. You inspired me to work on a very possible European duel citizenship, with San Miguel always lingering in the back of my mind.
You’re welcome, Paula. Yes, Americans have some homework to do now, which could mark the beginning of possible new adventures.
To me, this is a predictable evolution of our country. Democracy can’t survive when a nation puts corporate profits ahead of social welfare, makes war the foundation of the economy, and demonizes people on the basis of their gender, religion and skin color. Hopefully, this is a wake up call for those of us who have lived so comfortably on the sidelines for the past 40 years. I’m sure I’m preaching to the choir!
I’m so WITH you on all of your points, querida Kim. Yes, this is what the U.S. is reaping for undervaluing the basic democratic principles it (purportedly) was founded on.
I know you are. And I worry about all of this hand wringing by the privileged. We are responsible for this. It’s not “their” fault!
Dearest Bonnie
What clear thinking and feeling on a cloudy day in our lives. Gracias. An American pasport used to be a treasured and much desired thing. The country that appeared to be the USA was built on slavery racism, misogny, antisemitism and exploitation. It appears to have uncivered these things in full light of day now. What The USA will become remisns to be seen. Nearly 50% of the voters did not want Trump as slightly more did. The future is unknown. I am blessed to live in Mexico where decency still prevails. May it return to The USA also.
Thank you, Judith, for your wise words. Yes, we are blessed to live in Mexico “where decency still prevails.” I fear for the good ol’ USA.
Well said, Bonnie. I plan to return to SMA soon.
Thank you, Toni dear! Safe and smooth travels back!
Oh, Bonnie, your words are my sentiments–I have been too numbed by despair from the election results to even try to put my feelings and thoughts into words. You’ve done that so well. Kim M., too. Democracy can’t win when so many people feel disenfranchised, forgotten and left out of “the dream.” The supreme irony of this is: I fear the person in power now will only cause those same people to suffer more. We’d all be wise to re-read or if we haven’t yet the writings about democracy by the famous French writer Alexis de Tocqueville. One comment I remember of his was that a democracy cannot survive without an educated populace. Our educational system has failed so many and they are the electors who have been thus so deceived by Trump.
As for moving, believe me, we have made sure that our passports are updated, and have truly thought of leaving–on the other hand, we feel we must stay and fight the good fight for the sake of our children and grandchildren, if we can find the energy. We will wait to see how things unfold and hope it won’t be nearly as bad as we suspect it will, that somehow, goodness and human decency and justice for all will win over the evil force that seems in play. Sorry, I droned on. You opened up the dam–my silent mourning is at last overflowing. Thank you for always sharing your wisdom.
Thank you so much, dear Sher, for sharing your thoughts here and letting “the dam” open up. Your points are well taken and expressed. Yes, the educational system has failed, but I suspect this has been part of the plan of those who pull the strings. They must be proud of themselves. It’s as if we’re watching a tragedy unfold, and it’s heartbreaking. I’m thankful to be old.
Yes, Bonnie, perhaps being old right now is a good thing–less time we have to endure this troubled world. On the other hand, I feel sad I have not been able to make it a better place for all, in spite of efforts.
Oh, but you’ve done SO much already, Sher! And I’m sure you’re destined to do more before check-out time. 🙂
Bonnie, this essay reflects so many of our thoughts, horrors, and yet our reflections on how best to cope. Thanks for the reminder to check our passports, we are completing the renewal application and submitting through our trusty Taos Post Office tomorrow. May the force of democracy stay with us all.
Thank you, dear Theresa. So good to hear from you. Yes, may that force stay with us all!